Sunday, August 19, 2007

Should you follow her if she says "let's dance"? - ARTICLE

Imagine that you have been chatting a bit with this girl and you already have some light fun connection going on.

She says: "Come, let's dance!"

What do you do?

  • Refuse?
  • Say you are a bad dancer?
  • Go with it?
  • Try to impress her on the dance floor?
  • Invite her for something else?

Here are some questions which need an answer:

  • Is a dance invitation already like a form of foreplay?
  • Is she inviting you to dance because she no longer wants to speak?
  • Will you loose your power if you "follow" her?

Let's be clear, ok?

This dance invitation is another test.

Most guys will fail that test because they simply do what she wants to expect.

Stepping on the dance floor with the usual moves is like having a simple conversation without specific highlight.

Now, if the dance becomes more "sexual" or openly flirty, you will trigger this extra interest in her.

Remember the art of sexual communication.

You do that with the words you choose, the questions you ask and the specific intention you bring into the interaction you have with her.

Dancing is simply another way of communicating.

If you are very good at communicating verbally, you might get away with being clumsy on the dance floor.

The only question you must ask yourself is:

"What can I do to increase attraction?"

This is like any other aspect of the dating game.

She wants to feel attracted to you!

Why? Because she wants to feel feminine.

When she feels attracted to you, she feels the exact type of sexual tension that she likes.

So, all you have to do is create something on the dance floor which will generate that type of attraction from her to you.

You need to stay on top of the game even on the dance floor.

Dancing is one of these dating or social situations you need to master.

So, should you respond to her invitation?

If you can dance and master it pretty well, sure go ahead and show her what you've got.

If you feel you can't score on that field, don't step in with her as you will burn your chances on the spot.

Now here are some ideas if you feel you are an okay dabcer and would like to increase your dancing game. These examples are for free dance situations, not ballroom dancing. Ballroom works with a totally different set of rules.

  • Touch her in subtle ways
  • Smile!
  • Keep your moves light!
  • Ad a sexual dimension to your dance!
  • Stay very confident!

Mistakes?

  • Don't overdo it! She can't care less if you dance for yourself! If she sees you lost in your performance she will think: "where do I fit in this?". Remember that dancing is an invitation to sexually communicate with her. Dance is a form of foreplay.
  • Unless you are a ballroom expert, don't lead her with will or force or direction.
  • Don't stare at her!
  • Don't be self absorbed!
  • Don't stretch it!
  • Don't claim her!

Now, the way you touch her is essential! It must be subtle.

Don't simply grab her hand or her whole body. This is usually embarrassing for her.

Instead, touch her hip, her back or arm. Caress them slightly in subtle ways.

Don't grab her! Instead, lightly touch her and let go.

Shift the ways you position yourself towards her: move to her side or behind her.

Make it sexual but not obvious.

If you feel that you are both warming up, you can of course get closer and eventually engage in more active foreplay.

Observe her response to your touch.

Be aware of the moment she is ready for you to come closer and do move closer otherwise she'll think you miss confidence.

More on this topic coming soon!

http://vitalcoaching.com/datingformen.htm

To your dating power!

vitalcoach